Friday, June 27, 2014

You Have Been Warned

Dear Appliances,

As you may be aware, the Bo Hunkmeister is going on a trip. This letter shall serve as your official notice to stay on duty. Previously, when the Bo Hunkmeister has gone away, a few of you decided that it would be great fun to stop working and leave me bereft of your services. While this has at times provided a small amount of amusement in the form of blog posts, in general, it has been a highly irritating happenstance.

Therefore, I am formally putting you on notice that failure to work according to your accepted standards will not be tolerated. It has already been an expensive year with the furnace, alternator and van transmission deciding to go AWOL. So much so that the Bo Hunkmeister and I were contemplating celebrating New Year’s Eve June 1 in the hopes of ending an expensive year and starting a newer, less expensive one. The UN however denied our request to alter the time/space continuum.

Thus you are hereby ordered to continue working. Please heed this notice. As the mom of six, two born by C-section, I am not to be trifled with. To paraphrase Shakespeare, hell hath no fury like a mom left without her appliances.

In closing, treat me right and I will treat you right. Resort to your previous hi-jinks and there will. be. pain.

Love Always,
the Domestic Goddess